Friday, December 2, 2011

Climbing down from the bridge

Thank you, Catherine.  You are right, I need to pull away from the caring bridge before I want to jump off again :)  I had a hard time sleeping this week, which was probably evident in my last post.  I've been consumed with thoughts of some kids who I've known who lost their lives to cancer.  I stare at Ty sleeping and I feel so incredibly lucky, and so guilty, and so scared of the possible reality that his cancer may come back.  I don't believe it will, I promise.  I do believe he is cured forever, and his amazing progress only helps me to know this is true; but it's only natural for my mind to race like it does.  In fact, the thoughts and visions I have of all the other children is spiritual for me.  As if I am somehow connected to these innocent beauties and I am lucky to know them.

Yesterday someone posted a long comment about her own struggles with infertility, and I appreciate how she shared her innermost feelings, I understand and can relate.  There is a post traumatic stress syndrome that is associated with such painful life experiences. I am healing, but I won't ever fully recover.  So thank you, for staying with me through all the ups and downs and always praying for my family.  I don't know what I would do without all of my friends and family, old and new, who have shared this journey with us.

Ty is doing SO WELL lately, I sometimes second guess whether or not I remembered to give him his daily doses of chemo.  This entire week he has been especially strong.  His bloodwork is good this week, and he is scheduled for his next infusion on Wednesday.  At that time, we will also switch his current chemo (Temodar) to start his next cycle of Etoposide.

He is becoming more and more physically active, and he is just increasingly HAPPY!  Less whining, less resistance, less anxiety and fewer questions about his next "pointy" (appointment).  He is sleeping very well with little or no medicine.  And, a lot of his hair on the back of his head started sprouting this week.  I thought it would never return because it has been so long since his last radiation treatment (4 months) but it finally looks promising.  I think the areas where there is permanent damage to the hair follicles will be relatively covered by his other hair if it continues to grow in.  I am so happy for him!  He doesn't care, but someday he might. 


Ty went to preschool Tuesday and Thursday and he was so happy to be back after all this time.  In fact, he didn't want to leave!  He cried so much on the way home Tuesday I had to pull the car over.  He is participating more in class, and he is making friends.  The girls, especially, are so cute.  They have this natural instinct to nurture, even at three years old.  When I get up to help Ty walk, they run over to hold his hands, too.  They want to help.  They want to sit next to him and help him reach for the paint or the crayons.  It is just so stinkin' cute. 

I feel with all my heart that Ty is going to grow up to be an amazing man someday.  He is so special, I am already so proud of the little boy he has become.  May he continue to make me beam with pride, so much so that I annoy my family and friends with my bragging :)  He will do great things.  I believe he is still here for reasons bigger than I am meant to understand. 

10 comments:

  1. Ty looks so great! I am so happy for all of you. God Bless!

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  2. What a GREAT pic of TY! He is soooo cute and looks so healthy and vibrant! LOVE!

    I hope y'all have a great weekend.

    Love,
    Jan
    Georgia

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  3. Mrs. Campbell,
    Stay strong. I am so happy to hear that Ty is back at school making new friends. One day when you look back on all of this you will realize how strong you and your family were.

    Prayers from Texas,
    Robert

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  4. I'm so happy For you all and so proud of Ty! He really is such a fighter and truly lives up to the name Super Ty!!! I love that little dude of yours. Like you Cindy, I see him as a strong and handsome young man with big things in his future. Reading your blogs I have worried and cried during the bad times with you. All I have to do is look at a picture of Ty's sweet face and beautiful smile and I'm filled with hope and joy. Then I say a prayer and think about all the prayers that are being sent out just for Ty and I know God is listening. God bless you all and thank you for sharing Ty and your story with us.
    Much love. Xoxoxo
    Annette

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  5. I am so happy that Ty is doing well. He looks so happy in that picture it brings tears to my eyes. You are definitely not alone in this journey. It's amazing that I am a stranger but I feel such a connection to you and your little boy and everything that you are all having to go through. I just think you are amazing. I'm glad that you realize how he has touched so many hearts. I talk about Ty at home and tell my kids about how brave he is all the time and what amazing people I think you all are. I am so happy that he is doing so well. I wish you all a beautiful Christmas. I know it will be a wonderful one for you and your family. Thanks again for sharing your story with all of us.

    Ann from Buffalo

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  6. I love this pic of him sitting on the bench. He looks like such a big, healthy boy! And that's great news on his increased appetite. I hope u all had a great Thanksgiving and have an amazing, well deserved Christmas. I see so many wonderful things for u guys this coming year, especially for Ty. Enjoy every second of this holiday season embracing each other with love and hugs! Sending huge hugs to u all! Xoxo
    Love, Allison

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  7. Soooo happy to hear all of these awesome reports! I share with my co-workers and family about Super Ty all of the time! He surely is a popular boy here in Central Ohio! Wishing you a wonderful holiday season, a Merry Christmas and COMPLETE HEALING 2012! Thanks for all of your up-dates, you are so great! Love you all!
    Lynn Salyer Dublin, OH

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