Showing posts from March, 2015

Cancer: The Emperor of All Maladies

The book sits on my nightstand.  I have referred to it often and found Siddhartha Mukherjee’s eloquent writing to be so perfectly explicative whether one has studied cancer at the PhD level, or for someone like me whose own child was diagnosed and who is desperately trying to learn about this evasive disease that took hold of my son.      I first learned that Ken Burns agreed to produce a documentary series based on the book for PBS in early 2014.  When I was asked if I would participate in a series of promotions for the documentary, I jumped out of my chair with enthusiasm.  I was so certain that a documentary like this would be crucial in helping the public better understand this disease that affects each and every one of us.  The magic that they created out of my clumsy interview simply takes my breath away.  My son was diagnosed in 2010 and I have since been completely wrapped up in cancer -- childhood cancer in particular -- and I am still overwhelmed by its complexi

Love and Ladybugs

I see a ladybug in my house about once a week.   This has been consistent since October.   The month he would have turned 7.   The month he died.   I think they are hibernating in my home and they are my most welcomed guests.   Of course, there is the occasional bespeckled corpse – belly up by my windowsill.   Sometimes, I might give a ladybug a little tap if I think it is dead, and he or she starts walking again.   I like to think Ty breathes a little life into them just for me… just for a moment… I don’t watch them for long. I prefer to take notice for a few seconds, then carry on with whatever I was doing.   It never fails that the ladybug is gone by the time I glance back.   Always gone. My visits from Ty are frequent, but brief, and because of that, it feels even more magical – as if it was a secret between the two of us. His whisper in my ear.   Sometimes I see one out of the corner of my eye just at the moment I am heavy with grief – my head swimming with thoughts of Ty