Sunday, January 20, 2013

HUMBLED

I can't tell you how humbled I am by all of the amazing and heartfelt nominations.  Your support is what keeps me going, and tonight it has made me so happy during my saddest days.  Your words are so incredibly kind that I am embarrassed because I know that it is Ty alone who is wonderful, amazing and UNSTOPPABLE.  I am just a crazy lady who doesn't deserve such accolades, but I truly appreciate all of the wonderful things that you have written about me and my family.  Thank you just isn't sufficient.  I wish there was a way to say it better, but the best I can do is a large font, all caps, giant shout-out at the top of my lungs:

THANK YOU SO MUCH!!! :)


We all miss Mely.  Look how much they love each other.  Gavin has been doing really well though, thank God, and keeping Lou and I entertained.  He is such a good boy, and he has such a great energy.  Like any kid, he just LOVES to have fun, and he has been changing so much over the past few months.  He's growing up so fast, and saying the cutest things imaginable.  This awesome batman doll was a gift to Ty when we first moved to Pawling in Dec. 2010.  Gavin was a toddler and much smaller than Batman.  Look at him now!  Makes me happy and sad at the same time. 


We had so much fun today.  I took him to the office for a few hours and he was such a good boy (until he had a meltdown at the end over an inappropriate you-tube spiderman video).  I had a couple of young volunteers come in, and we got so much done!  We also had a huge conference table delivered by a loving family who have been huge supporters of the foundation.  We are ready to do big things at the TLC Foundation!!  I love walking into that office and seeing Ty everywhere.  It is my favorite place to be and every day goes by too quickly when I'm there.  There is never enough time to get through my email and do all the things I want to do!  Which is a really good problem to have. 

When we came home, I was watching Gavin eat his lunch and I couldn't stop staring at him.  Thinking about how much I love him.  I asked him "do you know who my favorite little boy is?" and he answered, "TY AND ME!"  I was so proud of him, that he included his brother like that without missing a beat. I hope it is always like that.  That Lou and I are able to keep Ty's memory alive in our family without ever making Gavin or any future children feel less important.  Future children, by the way, remains undecided between Lou and I.  For those of you have mentioned it to us, thank you so much for your faith in our ability as parents, and we do have so much love to give, but we are just hurting too much right now to be rational about that yet.  Time will tell. 

I have been fighting a cold, and tonight I have a nagging cough.  I am breathing shallow to avoid coughing as much as possible, and I can't stop thinking about my poor baby Ty and all he went through.  I can't get the sound of his garbled breathing out of my mind.  How for months he couldn't swallow his secretions well and his breathing was so compromised.  I think about how uncomfortable I am right now and can't help but imagine how much worse it must have been for him.  Not just when his breathing was difficult, but there are so many different phases of suffering he experienced over those 2+ years.... that reality and those memories are the only things that help me to be grateful that he is finally free.  It helps me to put my selfish needs aside - my need to hold him and hear his voice - and feel better knowing he is free.  He is soaring.  He is happy.  He simply has to be or life would lose all meaning to me.  Look at this beautiful face.  God's work. 


I can't wait until I am with him and I can understand all of this, but until then I promise you that I will enjoy Lou and Gavin and whatever my future holds.  But I am not afraid to die.  Not one bit.  I promise to love and appreciate the life that is ahead of me, but I also welcome the day that I can see my angel baby again. 

Thank you for my signs, Ty.  They make me so happy.  I worry about you constantly.  It feels so wrong not knowing where you are or what you are doing.  Then you send me something beautiful and I know everything is okay.  You are and always will be the best good boy in the whole wide world. 


42 comments:

  1. Such strength, realness and faith...keep going!!! The Cosentino's from Fishkill are continuing to pray for your family, God Bless you all!!

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    1. I wanted to share this with you Lou and Gavin. I have followed your story from the beginning. I love ty and all if you. Today I was on a plane on my way home and looking out the window up in the clouds I Just thought how beautiful it looked and how close to heaven I was. All of a sudden out of no where a LADYBUG appeared on the small plane window. Instantly I said hi ty. Tears ran down my cheeks. I spoke to ty and said I never met you all but I would write to you and let you all no ty is flying high in the beautiful sky. What an awesome thing I got to experience. And all because you are all so amazing to share your ty with the world. I hope thus made u smile. It sure did me;)
      Love Michelle

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  2. We all hope you win the contest!! You are amazing. Just wondering if you will be able to see Mely again. Not sure where she lives and if it's a place you can visit.
    That is so cute that Gavin said him and Ty are your favorite little boys. So sweet!!
    Thanks for keeping us updated. Look forward to your posts and pictures.
    -Jennifer

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  3. Love all of you. Can someone tell me where I can get a superty shirt? I'd also like to sell them and give the profits back to you Cindy, just tell me how.

    Rita

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  4. Ty deserves this win!
    here's my nonimation

    In life love is not rare. Love comes and goes bringing out the best in all of us. But only once in a blue moon does one witness love in its purest form. True love. Love that can be seen, love that can be touched. It’s magically and it last forever. That is the love Cindy Campbell had and continues to have for her beautiful sons Ty and Gavin. When Ty was two years old he was a typical toddler with bouncy curls, bright eyes and a great love for super heroes. All that changed one horrible day when Ty was diagnosed with an extra renal rhabdoid tumor; a very rare and aggressive cancer. But Cindy’s love didn’t change. I’d say it grew stronger, if even possible. The next three years of Ty’s life the Campbell’s were thrust into an ugly battle field. They were forced to watch as the very things Ty just began to learn were taking away from him. Through the process of treating the cancer in Ty’s body he lost function in his legs and was unable to walk. Although he went through so much pain at such a young age Ty was always smiling. His smile was so precious. Miles away from this little boy I would wait anxiously to see ‘Ty’s smile of the day’ on Cindy’s blog SuperTy.org. Even though I had seen Ty’s smile the day before, each day it would fill me with joy, and the warmth of sunshine. I couldn’t help forming my own smile back and praying harder for his recovery. Maybe one reason we call him SuperTy is because of Ty’s devotion to super heroes. But there’s another reason, it is plain and simply because Ty was a superhero. He had the amazing super power to hold on to joy throughout the pain. To keep on smiling. To remain positive. And let me tell you the source of our wonderful Ty’s super power- his outstanding mommy, Cindy Campbell. Cindy cared for Ty his entire life with love and devotion. She was always there to help him in any way he needed. When Ty was unable to leave the living room couch he lived on, when he could barely talk; Cindy did what many would think impossible, she gave him a childhood. She goofed around to make him laugh. She held a toy catalog up for him so he could see the toys. She sat next to him there for hours. She instilled in Ty hope. She told him he will jump in muddy puddles. She gave him so many reasons to smile. Ty will forever be my Superhero but more importantly Cindy is who I want to be when I grow up.
    On October 17 when Ty passed away the hope didn’t die. As beyond the word heartbroken I was and as much as I could in no way shape or from imagine Cindy’s heartbreak, I knew their love story wasn’t over. And that is why Cindy Campbell is your unstoppable mom. She has not stopped fighting. She has not stopped giving it her bestest. She has not stopped inspiring me for one second. The Ty Louis Campbell Foundation is blossoming. Gavin Campbell has the best mommy in the planet. I am privileged to feel the infinite love Cindy has for Ty through her blog. And you just found your Unstoppable Mom.

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    1. I nominated Cindy as well - your words were beautiful and made me cry. I sure hope she wins...thanks for sharing.

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    2. Wow! Well said. What a great summary of Cindy and Ty's story... Brought tears to my eyes, again.

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    3. Amazing!!! If that doesn't get Cindy voted I don't know what will!!! Hopefully all of us voting her in as well will be the icing on the cake!!


      Love. Gabrielle

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  5. I'd like to share a link on Youtube to a video I created that I'll be submitting with the Unstoppable Mom competition. I used Cindy's words on the video from her blog that I think demonstrate how amazing and unstoppable she is. She is my hero.
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_OfDaiR49IY
    Sarah Perry

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    1. Just watched your video...absoultely beautiful!!!

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    2. Very touching video - I cried from beginning to end.

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    3. Oh my. I am at a loss of words. Beautiful is not enough.

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    4. Sarah Perry you are an amazingly beautiful soul. Your video touched my heart so deeply. Your video alone should win this for Cindy. That was unbelievable. I truly don't have the right words. God bless you. You have honored Ty so beautifully. Geri Sargent

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    5. Wow, Sarah. That was beautiful and made me cry. Great job!

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    6. Sarah - Your video is beautiful.

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    7. AMAZING!! BEAUTIFUL!! HEARTBREAKING!! If that doesn't make Cindy the winner, I don't know what would. Cried the whole way through.
      -Jennifer Russo

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    8. thank u! its so so beautiful! really captured Cindy and Ty's spirt!

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    9. oh my goodness, this is beautiful, Sarah. Cindy is going to win, no doubt about it. You hear that,Cindy, you are going to win. If anyone deserves it, you do.

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    10. Great job. Love the video!!!! I really hope she wins.

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    11. Sarah the video is SO AMAZING!!!! Though I watched it through tears!! This surely has to seal the deal!!!

      Gabrielle

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  6. Another nomination. I just sent mine in.

    I have never met Cindy Campbell. We have never spoken. Yet, she is my hero.
    ...
    Cindy Campbell has her boxing gloves on and is one Unstoppable Mom prepared to defeat a seemingly unstoppable disease!

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  7. I just sent mine in too...

    This incredibly brave Mother blogged about the heart breaking journey between the life and death of her beautiful little five year old Ty Louis Campbell. If you just read her blog you will understand why she so deserves this! She will do such good for all little children suffering from pediatric cancer if she wins this! The money she receives would go towards helping find better less painful alternatives for treatment and also tdo help find a cure for this horrible disease. No one realizes that this particular cancer only gets less than 5% of funding from the NCI. Anyway, if you read Cindy Campbell's blog at superty.org your heart will fill with everlasting love and break in to the tiniest of pieces all at once. She blogs about the day her beautiful little boy died, how she bathed him to prepare him for his cremation and trip to heaven, how she held and snuggled him all night after he passed away because it was the first time in a long time she was able to hug him without hurting him. Trust me, if any woman deserves this award it is Cindy Campbell, PLEASE read the blog and I promise you will agree!!! Once you read how sweet and couragious her little boy TY was and read their story your life will never be the same. Attached is a picture of Cindy and Ty just days before he passed away.

    Rita

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  8. My son has a rare genetic condition and has had problems w/ his heart, spine, neck, hearing, breathing, swallowing, and a bunch of other stuff. Today we found out he might lose vision in his left eye. I was devastated, and was feeling so upset when I looked up at the ceiling in my MIL and FIL's house and there was a lady bug! It helped so much. I just wanted to thank you for that. About to go nominate you!

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  9. God Bless and I hope you win also, 1. because you deserve it, 2. What a great opportunity for you to gain support for the fight against childhood cancer.

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  10. Unfortunately, my old computer wouldn't allow me to open the nomination link but I do pray you win, Cindy. You and Lou deserve every award out there. God Bless your incredible family.

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  11. I have continued to follow your blog after Ty passed away because your story - his story - has touched my life. I think of Ty often and just knowing Ty through your blog has made me love my daughter in an even deeper way than I ever thought possible. I have your son to thank for that!
    Anyway, tonight, I was inspired to comment because of the photo you posted of Ty. He is so incredibly beautiful. Truly an angel. Even while on this earth, his ethereal beauty is outstanding. Our family sends you thoughts of love.

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  12. I just sent in my nomination...
    You deserve it Cindy!

    Cindy Campbell...the very definition of UNSTOPPABLE! I'm pretty sure this is not the first time you are hearing her name, and I am absolutely POSITIVE it won't be the last. Cindy deserves this recognition more than anyone else I know. Cindy is the loving mother or Ty and Gavin and wife of Lou. Her life was turned upside down in 2010. One day life was perfect, couldn't get better...the next, her worst nightmare had come true. Her baby boy was sick...very sick. Ty was diagnosed with cancer.
    Cindy created a blog, superty.org, to share Ty's daily challenges and triumphs as well as her deepest emotions and thoughts each step of the way. She opened her heart and brought each reader along for this awful, yet unbelievably inspiring, roller coaster ride of battling pediatric cancer with her innocent, beautiful, courageous little boy named Ty...SuperTy! From the very beginning, to the heartbreaking end of his short life here on Earth just three months ago, and still today. This was how I "met" Cindy and her amazing family. Never, in my life, could I have imagined feeling so close, so connected to people whom I have never even stood face to face with.
    It would be absolutely impossible to explain all this family endured over the past two plus years, in just 2000 characters. What I can tell you, is how Cindy has NOT stopped...not once.
    She has never stopped LOVING-
    She has never stopped BELIEVING-
    She has never stopped GIVING-
    She has never stopped FIGHTING...
    And I promise you, SHE NEVER WILL!
    Cindy has lost the love of her life, her best good boy, her heart and soul, and yet she has not stopped! When many would have crumbled, she continues to battle through the heart wrenching pain and fight the battle which Ty can no longer. She is determined to raise awareness of pediatric cancer, to help find new treatments and cures for this disgusting disease.. so that one day, no child will have to suffer like Ty. Please, please choose Cindy!
    Cindy Campbell=UNSTOPPABLE!

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  13. I tried to nominate you Cindy but it must be for Americans and Canadians only. Please let me know if I am doing it wrong.

    When you said you weren't afraid to die and you looked forward to seeing Ty again it really struck home with me. It was a conversation I had with a couple of ladies recently. They said they were afraid of dying but I said I wasn't. Death doesn't scare me anymore as I know I will see my grandson again and so look forward to that day. I sometimes hate saying that out loud because I don't want people to think I would do anything stupid. I wouldn't, and I don't want to leave my other grandson but if I was told my day was to come soon it would not scare me like it would have once upon a time. Your whole view on life changes once you lose a love like this.

    I really like your ladybug poster above as well. It is so you!

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  14. this is such a humble loving post. oh, just the thought of your having another baby makes my heart sing. i am inlove with Gavin, his wisdom is beyond his years, his sweetness is sweeter than any candy. no child would have ever answered like that. he is selfless and loving and i know that he will make Ty so proud and will keep his memory alive and do major things. And i will keep saying it again and again he will be the best big brother in the owrld because he ;earned it from having a best brother in the world. I love you Ty. you are amazing. I would love to maybe meet you one day too.

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  15. another vote for you...

    I am nominating a woman that I have never met, but feel as though I am connected to her through her beautiful and eloquent words that she shares on her blog called superty.org. Cindy's son Ty fought and lost a battle with brain cancer. Cindy shared her story on the blog of Ty's countless surgeries, miracles, set backs, Ty's untimely death, and now her hope and sorrow in the days without Ty. She has thousands who follow her, show her support and are inspired by her strength everyday. She was unstoppable throughout her long fight against Ty's cancer and she is unstoppable now in her love and dedication to her other son, Gavin, as well as to the foundation she established in Tys name to raise awareness and funds for pediatric cancer research. I for one can say that she has changed my life , even though as already stated, I never met her. She has made me aware of, and made me passionate in the fight against pediatric cancer. She motivates me to be the best mom I can be to my two healthy children, and she has restored my faith in life, in hope and in survival. Cindy deserves this more than anyone I know. Not many people could look cancer in the eye and keep going in the fight even after losing a precious 5 year old child. Even if she doesn't win, please check out her blog. It will bring you to your knees in sorrow and tears and it will also give you hope and strength and desire to stand up and fight for children like Ty Louis Campbell and the best mom that he could have ever been given on this earth.

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    1. Beautiful, it mirrors exactly what I wrote in my nomination! I know shes going to win!

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  16. I cant really describe with words how strong you are.

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  17. Cindy:
    I nominated you without a bit of hesitation. Below is what I posted. I hope I have done just a little to give you credit. One thing I wanted to pass along. I watched a local news show and there was a psychic reader. It caught my attention since she was explaining the difference between what she does and a median. I do not know how you feel but I believe there is a heaven, I believe that our loved ones don't leave us, I believe they see us, I believe they can do amazing things in heaven so I therefore believe they continue to communicate with us. This women explained that our loved ones do come in and out of our lives and if you all of a sudden for no reason feel tingly or your hair stands up, or you have a warm feeling that just simply makes you pause, or the lights flicker, that is a sign of a loved one checking in on us. She said that sometimes their signs are so inconspicuous that we do not even realize it. Cindy, my point being as I read your blogs and read the signs is, TY IS WITH YOU, HE KEEPS WATCH, HE KEEPS LOVING YOU!!!! Now he simply does it without pain.


    2000 words are simply not enough to describe why Cindy Campbell is an Unstoppable Mom. She is a person I have never met but through her journey of having to set her 5 year old son free and turn him over to God, I can honestly say I love her and respect her. She is a woman of strength, dignity, class, faith, and endless love. Cindy lived an unimaginable horror. She watched and helped her 5 year old son fight brain cancer for 2 years. Unstoppable is exactly what she was. When so many would have fallen never to get up, she not only trudged, she fought like hell to save her son's life. If she could, she would have laid down her own life. She researched into the early morning light only to perhaps lay her head on the pillow to get back up and deal with whatever cancer through at her. She drove miles in endless traffic to take her son to therapy and endless doctor appointments. She strived to find every way to make sure her son was could enjoy his life taking him to preschool and carrying him on her hip through Disney World until her back ached and she continued on. Even during the process of handing her son over to angels to take him to heaven she did not give up. She prayed and believed a miracle would happen. This mom bathed, dressed cuddled, stroked, and held her son even after he entered heaven. She is unstoppable and amazing. She is what I strive to be as a mom. And now, she continues to fight and refuses to be stopped or silenced until not another baby dies or suffers through the cruel treatments of cancer. She fights to make September gold as prominent as pink in October and she is making a difference. Cindy Campbell has changed my life. She has made me a better mom. My toughest days do not even come close to what she considered a good day. She believed and kept fighting when she was told her son had only weeks left and was rewarded with two more years. Now, she continues through her pain to make a difference. She is unstoppable.

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  18. Cindy,

    I know you are working to kick cancer's butt and I came across a documentary that had some interesting information in it. I don't know if you've seen it, but it's called Food Matters. As you push ahead to help find better cures, I thought the information in it is particularly interesting for what you are trying to do. http://www.foodmatters.tv/

    Keep fighting and keep letting us know how we can help!

    Amanda

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  19. Cindy, I've come to know you through your blog and I have to say I love you like a sister. So with that in mind, I am going to tell you what's on my mind (only prompted by what you said half-way through this post, sorry!!) Go ahead and have another baby. You will give yourselves the gift of new joy, new love, new hope..... And of course a new sibling for Gavin. You've often said how lonely he is, and that's a heart-breaker for sure. I know it's all so soon after the death of sweet big boy Ty, so when you feel ready... You deserve it all.
    My 5 year old Ryan was sitting on my lap while I was reading this post (and my middle boy Gavin was climbing on my back). Ryan wanted to know who that boy is ("Ty") and what we he was doing ("he was sick"). Ryan said "is he all better now?".... and of course I said "yes he is".
    Much love. Can't wait to hear more about the TLCF and what we can do to help.
    Christine

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  20. No one deserves this more than you and the foundation, and most of all...Ty...he deserves you to win this. He will be so proud when you win and smiling so bright! And that picture is just beautiful as are all of the pics of TY - he is truly a representation of God's work.

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  21. I would like to nominate you need an email address though. Hope you make it!

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    1. tylouiscampbell@gmail.com

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  22. I hope you win...but you are already a winner, Cindy!

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  23. Hi Cindy- I have nominated you as well. Here's my post:

    It's difficult to put into words why Cindy Campbell is an unstoppable mom. I'm afraid that I won't be able to do her justice. I guess I will start off by saying that Cindy & I went to high school together almost 20 years ago! Although we ran in different circles, she always offered a friendly smile in the hallways. Even back then she was filled with optimism. I came across her blog one day on Facebook (as we had another mutual high school friend in common) & I have been following it for over 2+ years now. I came to learn that her son Ty was diagnosed with a rare form of pediatric cancer. Her story hit so close to home, not only because we went to high school together, but also because I as well have a son the same age. I found myself constantly checking her blog to follow Ty's progress & saying a prayer each night for this little boy to find a cure. Despite all of the setbacks Ty encountered, Cindy remained hopeful that he would indeed survive. She was/is his biggest advocate. Unfortunately, Ty didn't make it, but Cindy continues to raise awareness for pediatric cancer so that Ty's life would not be lost in vain & to raise money for the next child who gets diagnosed. She is an inspiration to mothers' all around the world. Her strength & bravery in the face of something so unimaginable is nothing short of amazing. The fact that she was able to remain composed & document Ty's trials & tribulations for all of us via her blog is no easy feat. Most of us would have drown in a sea of despair, but not this mom. She gives new meaning to the definition of what it is to be a mom. She inspires us all to be the best moms we can be- by encouraging us to value the time we have with our children & let them have 'just one more story' or 'jump in that muddy puddle!' I try each day not to take for granted all that I have. Cindy loved Ty. She made the most of the short life he had. He was so happy despite his illness-no doubt because he was given Cindy as a mom. Www.superty.org

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  24. I often think Ty looks so much like Cindy. But in this picture he looks just like Lou! :) He is still in my prayers and I hope that you all can find moments of true happiness in your life each day even through the sadness. Best wishes on the Foundation.

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