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Showing posts from February, 2012
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No evidence of disease.  Hallelujah.  Thank you so much for all of your love.  On top of that amazing news (breathe), Ty also gained another pound and a half!  In just two weeks!  He is a healthy growing boy and everyone at the hospital was commenting on how well he looks.  Today was a long, exhausting and rejoiceful day.  I left the house this morning draped in jewelry with my pockets overflowing.  I wanted to have all of you close to me for support.  So many items to remind me of Ty and Gavin - along with beautiful good luck tokens and unique religious mementos of every denomination - have been thoughtfully gifted to me, Lou and Ty over these 18 months, and it is so comforting to feel that love from head to toe.  I had my worry stone, my lucky ladybugs, my miracle stars, my bracelet, my medals, my stones, my coins, my necklaces, my SuperTy and "Cure Cancer" tees, my wallet inserts, my pictures, my prayer cards and more!  It really reminded me how many people love Ty and

Wednesday can't come fast enough

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Two more days until Ty's MRI and I am beyond anxious.  The worst is how I analyze everything Ty does.  Poor kid. I don't want to freak him out, but it's hard to control when I am freaking out myself! "Why are you squinting at the TV, do your eyes hurt?  Can you see alright?" "Why are you breathing like that, do you have a belly ache?  Do you feel sick?" "I heard you cough, do you feel nauseous?  Are you going to throw up?" "Why won't you answer me?  Can you hear me okay?" For months now, when Ty coughs he usually yells across the room, "I'm oh-tay, I just coughing, I not sick."  I guess I've conditioned him because he knows that as soon as I hear something like that I drop whatever I'm doing and come running with a bucket.  I'm not sure that instinct will ever go away completely.    I am just so lucky that Ty really hasn't been sick like that in a very long time - that I am mostly responding

Winter Fun

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It feels like winter is finally here, just as we started gearing up for Spring!  My poor confused hyacinth and daffodil bulbs; they started coming up a few weeks ago and then we woke up to three inches of snow on Friday.  I was happy to see the snow and I have my fingers crossed that the tulips I planted with Ty and Gavin will fair better than the early bloomers :)  I had big plans to go to Costco on Friday (woo hoo), but I was happy to pun on our snowpants instead and start shoveling.  It was warm enough where Gavin was able to play in the snow with me for a couple of hours and we had a great time.  Ty came out, too, but didn't last long at all.  Probably because he was sitting in the snow instead of walking around so I think he just got cold.  He threw a couple of snow balls at me and called it a day :) Here are some pictures of Gavin with our snowman.  I also want to share some really sweet photos from our last trip to Vermont.  I mentioned how much fun Ty and Gavi

Bereavement

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Pete and Mary, my cousin and his wife, will never be the same.  They are bereaved parents and they are broken.  Today would have been their baby Remy's first birthday.  Their situation is one that I can imagine more than most because I have come so close to being in their shoes so many times, and because I live in the constant fear of Ty suffering a relapse.  Bereaved parents suffer every single day of their lives from a throbbing wound that will never heal.  When I have the rare opportunity to run to the supermarket or the pharmacy without Ty, I feel his absence the entire time.  There is a heavy, fearful awareness that the most important thing in the world to me is simply missing, even though I am perfectly sure that he is safe at home.  (Don't get me wrong, those feelings of absence occur in whispering nanoseconds that are quickly replaced with feelings of sheer freedom :)  ). If I ever lost my Ty, I don't imagine I would ever stop looking for him in my rear view

Fun and fear

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I'm sorry that it's taken me so long to share updates. The last few days have had their fair share of ups and downs... fun and fear... but mostly fun (thank God). The few nights that I was online attempting to post an update turned out to be pretty rough. Ty has been more restless than usual, and just as I would get comfortable with my computer in my lap I would hear him crying. Sorry everyone, but snuggling up with my little man always takes precedence over everything else :) I'll go ahead and get the "fear" part out of the way because it is weighing on my mind and it always feels better to talk about it. Three nights this week, Ty woke up in the middle of the night whining. He was only half awake and he wouldn't talk to me when I asked what was wrong. His behavior reminded me so much of how he used to be as a toddler just before his diagnosis. He was whimpering while holding his head and there has been a lump in my throat ever since. Lou and I are both c

Love to you all

Last Valentine's Day, Lou, Ty and I were in the pediatric intensive care unit (PICU) at Weill Cornell NY Presbyterian Hospital.  In hindsight, those days were horrific... but we were clinging onto hope.  Hope ends only when you stop believing, and we will never stop believing in Ty.  God, he has been through so much.  He is one amazing kid.  SuperTy indeed.  I love him and Gavin to infinity and back and I am the luckiest mommy in the world.  This Valentine's Day was an entirely different story.  Ty spent the morning with me at preschool where he made beautiful Valentine's for all of his loved ones.  He was walking around his classroom with minimal support from me, and he got a huge smooch on the cheek from one of his classmates (so did I, she is a sweetheart). Then we spent the rest of the day at home with Gavin, having tons of fun doing nothing special.  Lou came home with flowers and we enjoyed a very loud, unromantic home-cooked meal filled with constant interruptions

Cancer is evil

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Stefanie Jacobowitz was a beautiful person.  She died of ovarian cancer three days ago and I haven't been able to stop thinking about her and her family.  She was 44 years old, she has three small children and she always struck me as such a loving mom and wife.  I looked up to her and admired her hysterical sense of humor and her easygoing perspective on life.  I am just so sorry and so sad.  I had so much to share about Ty's progress the other night but when I logged onto my computer and learned about Stefanie, I simply couldn't write anything.  I was completely caught off guard and I have been so depressed over the news.  I just needed a couple of days before I could update everyone on the little things happening in the Campbell family when another wonderful family is hurting so much.  I worked with Stefanie for several years when I was younger, and we reconnected on Facebook about five or six years ago.   She followed Ty's journey and sent me words of encourageme

Two steps forward

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For some reason, the titles on my latest posts have not been showing up on the site.  In case that happens again tonight, I want you to know that the title for today's entry should read, "Two Steps Forward."  That is because Ty took two steps all on his own.  He has been increasingly brave over the past two weeks and he has been letting go of our hands to stand on his own for several seconds at a time.  Tonight, he decided to walk forward and he was able to take two small but steady steps before grabbing for our hands again.  I think he is starting to realize how important it is for him to just take a chance and give it a try.  If he is going to walk on his own again someday, he has to start somewhere! This is all so wonderful and new.  I feel more excited today than when he took his first steps at 10 months old!  It is also a bit scarier now than it was then.  When he was a baby, he was used to falling over.  He was wobbly, he fell on his bum, he picked himself up and

Next MRI

Ty's next MRI of the full brain and spine is scheduled for Wednesday, February 29th.  Fingers crossed for a lucky leap year!  I originally posted February 8th on his Facebook page, but Lou has since reminded me that it won't be until the end of the month.  Thanks to all of those who have been reaching out and wishing us luck for tomorrow.  I will be holding onto all of those well wishes and saving them for three weeks from now.  Ty and Gavin are both doing great this week.  We have been having a lot of fun together and trying to take advantage of Ty's increased appetite by making a lot of extra trips to the supermarket and CVS for whatever he is in the mood for.  Mostly pretzels, but sometimes cheese and yogurt drinks, too.  He even had a turkey rollup yesterday.  We took the boys snow tubing yesterday and I have a very fun video to share with you as soon as I have a chance to download.  Ty absolutely loved it and he went over and over and over again.  We were so impres

Cute story

I just have a very short and sweet story to share.  On Friday, I had to take Ty for his blood work.  Although everything came back fine during our hospital visit on Wednesday, we are still being very conservative when it comes to his platelet count, so we had it checked again later in the week.  There is a lab at the local hospital that is open 24 hours and can provide the results within an hour or two, so we have been going there for several months now.  Everyone who works there is getting to know Ty, and they treat him very well.  I don't think they have a lot of young patients coming in, so most of them dote on Ty whenever we visit.  It's not easy, because Ty knows that it's going to hurt and he puts on quite a show every time we visit, but they try to calm him down the best they can.  Most recently, there was a young guy working there who I have never seen before.  I would guess he is in his early to mid-twenties.  While we sat waiting for one of the nurses to come

Finding Peace

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Today was a very long day at the hospital, but it was also a great day.  I had my moments where I wanted to scream and cry for all of the children like the teenager who lost her leg or the tiny baby in his crib getting his first toxic infusion, or Ty, who screamed and carried on as he always does when it's time for the needles.  But then it was time for Ty's bi-weekly weight and he gained a whopping TWO POUNDS!  This has never happened before.  When Ty was diagnosed in August 2010 he weighed 13 kilos, and in May he weighed only ten.  Today he was 12.7 (28 pounds).  We were elated.  I hope he can keep it up!  Maybe it's the corn on the cob.  Ty is finally able to enjoy his time at the hospital.  His chemo is tolerable and he is genuinely happy playing games or arts and crafts in the toy room.  The toy room is in the middle of the large waiting room and surrounded by glass walls.  For over a year, I used to peer into that room and envy all of those children.  I used to b