Look at this guy! He's doing okay. Lots of nausea, but lots of smiles, too. Here he is in his "activity chair" getting physical therapy. He spent a lot of time sitting up like this today and playing games. He has come such a long way over the past couple of weeks, it makes my heart sing. Sorry it's sideways, but I can't seem to fix it.
Tomorrow Ty will have an MRI to rule out whether or not the tumor might be causing his incessant nausea. In my heart I don't think this is tumor related, but I am still a nervous wreck about it. I will be praying all night, all morning and all day until we get the results following tumor board. The doctors should also be able to deliver a better idea around next steps post-radiation, as well. It will be a big day, please pray for us.
Pasted below is a poem that I've read this on several other blogs from moms who have lost a child or who are in a similar situation as my own. I don't recall ever reading it before I entered into this difficult reality of mine (or perhaps it just hadn't resonated with me in the past). It really hits home, especially when I'm so sick and tired of walking these hospital halls that my feet ache. Since the author is unknown, I took the liberty of adding/omitting so it best fits my situation.
I am wearing a pair of shoes.
They are ugly shoes.
I hate my shoes.
Each day I wear them, and each day I wish I had another pair.
Some days my shoes hurt so bad that I do not think I cannot take another step.
Yet, I continue to wear them.
I get funny looks wearing these shoes.
I can tell in others eyes that they are glad they are my shoes and not theirs.
To truly understand these shoes you must walk in them.
But, once you put them on, you can never take them off.
I now realize that I am not the only one who wears these shoes.
There are many pairs in this world. Too many.
Some women ache daily as they try and walk in them.
Some have learned how to walk in them so they don’t hurt quite as much.
Some have worn the shoes so long that days will go by before they think about how much they hurt.
No woman deserves to wear these shoes.
Yet, because of these shoes I am a stronger woman.
These shoes have given me the strength to face anything.
They have made me who I am.
- author unknown